Opinion (onions)
opinion
Great Minds Think About Whatever
Aug 31st
Saint Josephs BDAY and “the LAST Supper”
Mar 17th
St. Joe’s Birthday (March 19th)
Saint Josephs day is march 19th or something. Do you know why he is a saint? He was appointed a saint by the Pope, because he was the spouse of the virgin mary, and she was a complete weirdo or whatever with all this divine vaginal stuff going on, and Joe was like – “oh god, FML”, I need a break. So the pope was like – OK dude, I get it. POOF. You are a saint. all set. And joe was like, no shit? Can I get a free membership to the sheep festival? The Pope was like – yeah. No.
The Last Supper (according to those there)
So the last supper is basically pretty important. Not only because its a legendary story, but also because there is a huge misconception about it. There is a pretty standard story that goes along with the last supper that includes brother jebus making some fine stew and bread to go with it. Also, there was a few rumors about booze, but I can”t confirm nor deny that portion. So anyway, the big thing about this is – it never happened. How do I know and be so sure? WELL…
Mainly because its THE LAST SUPPER. And I am pretty sure since jeebus made all that stuff, there have been other suppers that people have had. So, it being the last is just a fable. They probably mean like.. “OH THIS IS THE LAST SUPPER I am making this damn stew, because I can’t find any good rosemary around up in this stable and whatever”. So that is pretty much a guaranteed fact i think. So, who knows when the last supper will be? Well, pretty much the people having it, I would venture to guess.
I also imagine there will be some serious arguments about when the last one will be. My guess is the second Saturday in august, since its the end of the world day. But back to the last supper we all know about. I am pretty sure they did not have ketchup there, which pretty much sucks.
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This post was sponsored by GOD (not godmode). Why? I won $2 in the lottery, so that pays for coffee which keeps me from going on a hissy-fit spree according to sources close to such incidents.
End of the World Day (website)
Jun 3rd
With so many religions and public figures predicting the end of the world (since the beginning of time), we here at the site thought it would only be appropriate to pick a day once a year where we can all just simply sit back and enjoy the end of the world together.
Starting NOW! The end of the world day will be the second Saturday in August (in 2011, that is August 13th), and will be celebrated each August until the end actually does occur. And possibly even after. Why not?
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Quote:
Endoftheworldday.com is all about embracing the end of the world – and why not? It happens so often, we thought “why not make it a regular holiday?!”
So we did.
So, from this year until FOREVER, End of the World Day will be the second Saturday in August.
So check out www.endoftheworldday.com for all your apocalyptic needs.
Mortal Moral Quandry: FINISH IT
Mar 26th
Hypomotheticaly speaking are you obligated to report seeing a dead body? I mean obligated in the legal sense as the moral one is undoubtedly “duh-UH!”. Lets say as a fer-instance you are hopping and bopping along to “She-bop” on your car radio (because it could happen if you are me) and you’re stopped in traffic on a busy city street and out of the corner of your eye there’s a dude in a windbreaker hanging out a window, arms dangling, a large piece of furniture or something pressed against them, a dead, hollow, deep look in their eyes. Factor in you have a mobile phone in your car (yes, your car, not your pants, we didn’t have pants or cell phones that could even fit into pants back then if we had them in the first place which we DIDN’T thanks for bringing up the painful realities of my youth again, you bastard) and you may or may not have completed a drugs/gun/human traficking deal that you swear is your last one and then you’re going legit and taking the night managers position at your uncles erotic button factory.
Well, what would YOU do if YOU were the driver? (yea, thats gonna be my catch-phrase and yes, its stolen)

Marshmallow: Job Killer or Killer Job?
Mar 23rd
Someone, somewhere has the job of measuring marshmallow consistency. I spent most of my afternoon fantasizing about this person. I wonder how many times a day someone calls them Mr./Ms Stay-Puft or if they are tired of unlicensed nuclear accelerators being playfully waved in their face day after day. When this person goes postal (or is it toastal?) I want to both be there and be their first victim.
What would YOU do if YOU were the driver?









