Land of the Dead
6-25-2005
This is a zombie movie from the guy who started zombie movies basically. BUT, I don’t think it’s as good as the trailers or commercials depicted. What pisses me off is, at the very end (spoiler coming) it seems that really, all along, the zombies just wanted to live out their new lives in peace just like normal, depressed procrastinating humans. That’s just plain stupid.
The last good zombie movie to come out was a remake of Dawn of the Dead (originally by Romero), and it was awesome - true in zombie genre form. It was gory, and funny with blood, bodies and guts all over the place. While LAND of the DEAD had basically the same... the dialog between actors was sort of bland, and there wasn’t really any beginning to the movie - unless you saw Romero’s previous work on the subject. Which is one reason that made it suck. Don’t get me wrong, the action was awesome, but the characters were not only unmemorable, but forgetful. I only remember the ones I have seen before, like Leguiziamo and Dennis Hopper.
Now, on to the good stuff. Zombies in this movie are bored of just walking around like stupid asses and finally decide to start acting human again like with their regular jobs and stuff, so the real humans will be like "what the fuck is this?" They seem REAL again... and then maybe will approach them or something, then the zombies can rip out their colons one last time. Cute premise, but seriously, seems like the writer had run out of ideas. Even 28 Days was better than this.
OK fine, they are Zombies, and are pretty stupid to begin with. But, one of the lines in this movie are "they are communicating with each other". This was the shitty part. They started to realize guns were cool, and stuff. So stupid. This movie turned a thing that was supposed to be archaic, and cave-man like, into just another bunch of crazies with guns. Who cared about the zombies after they learned to use guns, weapons and shit? NOT ME! Sure they still but your head off and stuff, but that’s no fun after the guy is already been shot 50 times with a machine gun.
I don’t go to the movies with a lot of expectations, as I have said before. But this is so SIMPLE: Zombies eat people. They don’t get smart, and learn not to defend themselves?! What the fuck is wrong here? If you are going to go see this movie, forget any real story like and go for the flesh eating bullshit that makes movies like this so good. Don’t close your eyes or look away when they bite off people’s cocks and tits - yet.... go to the bathroom when the big black service station guy figures out how to full the trigger of an M-16.
So simple, it could have been a masterpiece. Yet, so easily fucked up.
Overall: 6
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